Incompletion: 15 Causes and Solutions
2. Working closely with people with whom you have poor synergy
There are lots of ways this can happen: incompatibility about listening, about willingness to explore ideas, about a “nose” for which ideas are worth exploring, about programming styles, about willingness to act courageously and decisively in the absence of complete understanding, about willingness to think or say or do things that other people disapprove of, about linear vs. gestalt styles of thought, etc.
Preventive measure
- Talk with them or work with them a while before you get into a project together, and notice your gut feel about whether they’d be good to work with. Try articulating your gut feel with someone else, who is a good listener.
Solutions
- Identify what you want them to do, and ask them to do it. Nonviolent Communication works well here: “I’m feeling frustrated because I’m not getting the kind of _____ that I need. Would you be willing to _____?” For example, if your pair partner’s attention is wandering while you’re driving, ask, “Would you be willing to pay super-attention to the screen while I’m typing, to be sure to catch any errors?”
Just asking for what you want solves the vast majority of problems. And when it doesn’t work, how to proceed usually becomes obvious. Asking explicitly for what you want clarifies the problem without introducing blame or criticism.
- If asking for what you want doesn’t lead to a happy working arrangement within a week, throw them overboard. An incompatible partner is death to a project. This problem must be fixed, whatever the cost. Do not let the fact that they have valuable strengths that you lack fool you into keeping them on, if your synergy is bad. Crucial insight to keep in mind: You can find another way to get whatever the partner is bringing to the table.
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